(no subject)

[garote]

Mmnnng. The person I was interested in is "taken", and it took me far too long to get a clue and notice that. All the waiting, for the right situation to say something in. ... Bad logistics. See, some things are too important not to do in person, but... Should I have tried over the phone? No, actually that was impossible too. Got myself tangled up inside again, hoping for the time. Yeah, it was stupid of me.

Now I feel more imprisoned in Carlsbad than ever. Stomach burning again. Glad for the happiness of others, but personally: feel utterly alone.

Stupid of me. All of this.

Comments

[akki.livejournal.com]

No, not stupid. Sometimes we get so caught up in our thoughts and fantasy worlds that we miss signs, warnings, etc. But it's no reason to feel dumb.

I actually didn't know you were in carlsbad. Why? I've never been there, so I don't know what I'm missing or not missing.

eep

[garote]

Carlsbad is actually an OK place to live, if you have friends and a good local source of income above and beyond work ... property here is getting increasingly expensive.

The trouble is, I'm spending all of my time working, saving money. I'm making very good progress with that, actually, but it's at the expense of everything else. To get this job in combination with cheap rent, I've been living far away from all my best friends.

Plus I'm currently single. EEK

Re: eep

[akki.livejournal.com]

What are you saving money for? Moving? Vacation? Records! Remember, it's not worth making gobs of money if you don't have the time to enjoy life outside of work. I'm saving money to move (I should have plenty by august!!!), but hopefully I won't have to do any overtime. I just have to keep my spending under control (HAH!).

$$$

[garote]

Currenly I'm saving money to pay off my car and taxes and stuff, but on top of that, I'm saving money in order to move, and finish school. Sometime this year I'm going to pack up my stuff and return to nothern California ... Probably either Davis or Sacramento. So I've got all the best reasons at heart, but the process is taking sooo long ...

[deletedflesh.livejournal.com]

huh. i had the same exact thing happen to me. quite long story, boring slightly too, but it dragged on for years with me just--not--realizing that -- because of a distance involved -- eeek deception -- which really, is worse than just finding out at the start. :|

Re

[garote]

Agreed. Much worse. In this instance it was hard to avoid, since the person's change in status occurred while I was still trying to get my shit together.

But oh well, what can ya do.