



( Click for the gory details... )
Grand total: $57,646.41
This horrendous number breaks down into a few categories that help to explain why it's so high.
The conversion:
Turning this thing into a good looking camper van, instead of just an empty shell for hauling cargo, was a huge expense. About $20,000 of that total is just for the conversion, and that's just for the level I brought it to. I deliberately left out all the optional appliances, so I could have a vehicle that was still versatile, and in retrospect that was an excellent decision. Post-conversion it's been easy to transport huge awkward items, and big loads of equipment, and up to ten people with seatbelts for all.
That said, I've met several people who saved extreme amounts of money by building the entire interior of their camper van by hand, using materials from the local hardware store and lumber yard, and their work looked just as good as what Sportsmobile did. It's an astonishing amount of labor, but it's a labor of love.
Living in Oakland:
I spent over $2000 on tires alone. Bastards kept slashing the sidewalls. Not because I was doing anything wrong -- the van was just parked on the street outside my house, like always. The mere fact that it was a camper van meant it was either a threat or a target, and invited abuse either way.
Add another $500 for replacing mangled locks and ignition cylinders, as various idiots tried to hot-wire the car. $200 for a stolen battery. $200 for extra-nasty locks bolted to the back and driver's side doors, and "club" locks on the steering wheel. $100 for an AirTag hidden in a box. I don't have complete records, but the stereo was stolen at least once.
Then there's the security system that I installed. I held out for as long as I could because I hate car alarms. That cost about $1100. So, we're looking at 4 grand just for living where I do.
It's not a cheap kind of car to start with:
I paid $4300 to cash to get the vehicle into my hands. That is extremely cheap for a 1997 Ford E-350 in the year 2004. The low price was mostly due to it having 146,000 miles on it, and also due to the interior being brutally trashed -- a fact that was irrelevant to me since I was going to have the interior gutted and covered up anyway.
Similar vehicles that weren't so trashed, and had fewer miles, sold for quite a lot more. Like, ten grand more. If you want a basis for comparison, the vehicle was seven years old when I bought it, and if you look for a used 2016 Ford E-350 with about 150,000 miles on it today, you'll get a price right around $25,000. A dollar today is only worth about 66 cents in 2004 money, so an equivalent 2004 price would be $16,500. What I'm saying is, I deliberately bought a really beat up vehicle with a good engine and (what I thought was) a good transmission, and expected to pour ten grand in parts into it over time just to bring it back up to scratch.
I only did that because I was poor and didn't want to put anything on credit. Given the choice again, I would have bought a vehicle that wasn't so beat up, and accepted a car loan. The problem there was, a used Ford E-350 cargo van with swing-out doors on the side and no holes cut in it was actually really hard to find.
If you take away the conversion costs and the Oakland mayhem from that total above, you're left with $34,000. Subtract $4300 for the initial purchase, and a further twelve grand of "expected" repairs like I explained above, and you're left with about $18,000.
Now subtract about 2 grand for all the damned smog fees and oil changes, and another 2 grand for an anticipated tune-up. That leaves 14 grand. And now, subtract ten thousand dollars for twenty years of good insurance coverage, which, THANK GOODNESS, I never had to use, because in 150 thousand miles and all that time, the van has only been in a couple of minor collisions with things like parking garage posts and shopping carts, despite being driven all over the country and up through Canada and Alaska, and even being used as a commute car in the Bay Area for a few desperate years.
So, $4,000 is what I lost, above and beyond the expected cost of the vehicle, in order to get almost 20 years of use out of it. That is, according to my handy calculator, about 15 dollars a month.
Is it still worth it? It depends on how much you use it. If you're curious, the resale value right now seems to be about 20 grand, in spite of the mileage.