If you spend your time trying to relax and being consciously aware of how poorly you're relaxing, you'll get stressed about your inability to let go of stress. Vicious circle. Perhaps you need to re-learn relaxation, but without actually being conscious that you're doing it.
Whenever I think about the idea of having trouble learning something, I remember something my dad told me about his childhood. He grew up on the east coast where the winters were cold and the lakes and ponds froze. All the kids went ice skating but he couldn't get the hang of it and kept falling over. One day some kids asked him to play ice hockey and he reluctantly agreed. He spent the day learning the game and having a great time, completely unaware that he had also learned to ice skate rather well.
Perhaps you need to do something that will distract you from the idea of learning to relax. Focus your energy on a low-key activity that you really and truly enjoy. Something that is, if not all-consuming, at least engaging enough to keep you interested but still a relatively calm pursuit. Eventually you'll realize that you work for yourself now and your time, all of your time, is your own.
Pick something you like that will get you out and about and give yourself some small goal, almost like a work task but without any real responsibility or deadline or dread. Something like: photograph two of every _____ in each bay area town. Whatever. Something you'd like that would be an entertaining pursuit. Then do it, but only if you enjoy it. Just give yourself something fun to do to distract yourself from this transition time while you re-learn relaxation.
Or just get on your bike and ride away for a year. Or don't.
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Date: 2011-07-23 06:52 pm (UTC)Whenever I think about the idea of having trouble learning something, I remember something my dad told me about his childhood. He grew up on the east coast where the winters were cold and the lakes and ponds froze. All the kids went ice skating but he couldn't get the hang of it and kept falling over. One day some kids asked him to play ice hockey and he reluctantly agreed. He spent the day learning the game and having a great time, completely unaware that he had also learned to ice skate rather well.
Perhaps you need to do something that will distract you from the idea of learning to relax. Focus your energy on a low-key activity that you really and truly enjoy. Something that is, if not all-consuming, at least engaging enough to keep you interested but still a relatively calm pursuit. Eventually you'll realize that you work for yourself now and your time, all of your time, is your own.
Pick something you like that will get you out and about and give yourself some small goal, almost like a work task but without any real responsibility or deadline or dread. Something like: photograph two of every _____ in each bay area town. Whatever. Something you'd like that would be an entertaining pursuit. Then do it, but only if you enjoy it. Just give yourself something fun to do to distract yourself from this transition time while you re-learn relaxation.
Or just get on your bike and ride away for a year. Or don't.